


My Penicillium (Blue Mould), Saving Me.

by TwoTeaspoonsOfSuga



Category: yoomin - Fandom, yoonmin - Fandom, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: AND THEN HAPPY, Angst, Blink if you miss it sex., Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Eating Disorder, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Lots of Crying, M/M, Sad Jimin, Then Happy everyone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-05
Updated: 2018-01-05
Packaged: 2019-02-28 13:03:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13272006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwoTeaspoonsOfSuga/pseuds/TwoTeaspoonsOfSuga
Summary: AN: I PROMISE I WILL DO SOME HAPPY YOONMIN SOON! Think of this as a flash back to the last one. Suga explains what went down on the night Jimin collapsed. Then, later, Jimin thanks him for saving him in front of the entire world.





	My Penicillium (Blue Mould), Saving Me.

Jimin is a perfectionist. But what Jimin fails to realise is that he’s also perfection. My Jimine. My broken angel. He went too far this time.

Always the first to protect us from harm, always the first to hold us when we cried. But back then, who was _his_ rock? It took us a slap in the face to realise…he didn’t have one.

There were warning signs, we all admitted it, but pushed them away because, in front of us, Jimin would never stop smiling. So we assumed, like most would, that he must be okay. He must be happy.

But he wasn’t happy. My poor Chim-Chim.

What nobody knew was the morning of the Inkigayo performance, I found Jimine on the floor of his room passed out. I ran to him, my heart hammering in my ears and splashed water in his face to wake him. Thankfully he woke up. He groaned, and I helped him to sit. He looked so confused, dazed like he’d woken from a nightmare and couldn’t grip his bearings. He looked so tired too, his eyes were puffy, and his face was pale and thin. He looked so weak.

But just for that split moment, before he realised it was me. Then his face transformed before my eyes into a smile. A huge smile that made his eyes crinkle at the sides, the one I had long ago fallen in love with.

“Yoongi Hyung… why were you splashing me?”

I was confused, pushing his damp hair out of his eyes. “You fainted.”

Somehow, he convinced me he was sleeping, that he had taken a liking to sleeping on the floor. Jimine had a way of soothing my worries.

It was dangerous sometimes.

The rest of the day he seemed okay, I even saw him eat a little before the performance. Hobi joked he’d have a bloated tummy when he went on. To this day Hobi still feels guilty for saying it. But it was never his fault. I tell him every-time he brings it up. I think that’s how we became so close me and him, we comforted each other after it happened.

If there was anything wrong with Chim, it did not show on stage, he was the sunshine he always was, playful and giggling. Even doing pull ups on a bar, there was no signs of it until he dropped from the bar.

I noticed…there was something in his eyes, he was licking his lips and his jaw was tense. I was before him as I left, and I didn’t see before I heard it.

Hobi cried out. “Jimine!”

I spun round and saw him there, like that morning, collapsed onto the floor in a heap. I saw black. There was nothing then but Jimin. Before anyone else could I was lifting him up off the floor, bridal style and rushing him back to our dressing room.

“Call an ambulance!” I heard Jin call. It was Namjoon who did. He told me later. I didn’t know it them I didn’t know anything.

I used the water again, after I lay him down over the couch. I flicked it on his face until his eyes cracked open, barley there. By now the rest were gathered around us.

“Is Jimin okay!” Kookie called his voice cracking. Jin shushed him and held onto him, to calm him.

“Stay here Kookie… he needs air.” “Jimine…” I whispered. “Are you okay…”

“Did they…see it.” His voice was so soft.

“See what?”

“I didn’t want ARMY to see me like this.” He whimpered his eyes filling with tears. It almost broke me, it almost broke me in two. But I was to remain calm I…I had too. I wiped them away, I lifted his head so he could intake more oxygen.

Back then we had an awful manager. A bastard. He would never do anything in front of me. Because he knew he wouldn’t leave the room with his dick in tact. He used to threaten the doesangs. Especially Kookie, who he would frequently strike. It was one of the other things I felt guilty of never realising.

And he was the reason I snapped. He pushed through them all.

“What’s going on!” he growled.

“Jimin fainted.” V murmured shyly.

“Well then get him home. He needs to be on a flight at 4am.” “He’s going to the hospital for as long as he needs.” I snapped. Jimin’s hand came over mine, gentle, shaky.

“It’s f-fine Hyung…”

“You listen to me Min Yoongi, you speak to me in that tone again and you’ll be on the first train home to the slums you came from. Jimin will be on that plane tomorrow if it kills him or you will both-”

He got no further before I stood, crossed the room and slammed him against the wall by his neck.

“Suga Hyung!” Namjoon gasped.

“You. Do not. Fuck with my family.” I spat as I was pulled away. Just in time for the paramedics to enter the room.

“Is this Park Jimin?” the paramedic asked, gesturing to him.

Upon a quick inspection they confirmed he should be hospitalised. Then came the question of who would accompany him.

“I will go. “ I demanded.

“Yoongi, you are too fired up.” Jin murmured laying a hard on my shoulder.  I pulled away.

“I’m going.”

“Maybe it should be me…” Tae whispered.

“I will not let a doesang go in my place!” I yelled and there was silence. It rang loud in the room. I breathed heavy as I turned to Jin. “And I will not allow you to be riddled with that anxiety that always plagues you so just…take them home. Look after them and…” my voice was quiet now. “Let me take care of Jiminie…It’s my fault he’s this hurt to begin with.”

“Yoongi Hyung, what do you mean?” Hobi whispered.

“It doesn’t matter just…look after each other, yes? I will make sure he is okay. I promise you.”

They nodded as Jimin was carried between them on a stretcher. They all shouted their love to Jimin. Asked him to get well. Then their hands touched my arms as I followed.

In the ambulance I thought I could stay strong, but locked in there with Jimin, pale and hooked up to an oxygen tank, I could barley contain my emotions. They listed off diagnosis as they rang the hospital.

Extreme Exhaustion, Malnutrition, Loss of muscle control. I couldn’t help it. I buried my head in my hand and started sob, pulling Jimin’s limp hand and pressing it to my forehead.

“Jiminie, I’m so sorry…”

I waited for three hours while the doctors stabilised him and got answers. They told me he had body dysmorphia, they told me he saw his body differently to the way the rest of the world saw it. At first I couldn’t understand. Jimin was so beautiful. Everybody told him so.

But then something entered my mind.

_“Yoongi is so handsome!”_

_“You’re so cool.” “You’re so charming._

_“Suga Hyung, the song is perfect.”_

_“Yoongi, you danced well today!” “I love you Hyung!”_  
  


I believed none of them. I realised then something was happening to us. BTS. We were hiding, hiding our hearts away. We were hurting ourselves.

I stayed with Jimin by his bedside all night. When he finally awoke midway through the next day the members had already been and left him surrounded by flowers. We talked for hours. He spilled all of his feelings to me, he cried and I held him through it.

He had been our emotional rock. And now I would be his.

And over the next weeks I was. As he returned he clung closer to me and me to him. I ordered that we have weekly spill sessions, where we would all talk about how we were feeling. The members agreed.

And after that manager was fired, things only went up for us.

I started to fall for Jimine and by some miracle he was falling for me. One night we came together, in a night of passion. And he held onto me tight afterwards and called me his. It was the greatest honour and compliment I’ve ever received and when we told our members, they cheered. They hugged us. Told us how loved we were.

But, somehow, after a while I began pushing him away. I was scared to be with him, I wanted him to love himself first. I was so scared that he would never love himself.

Then I realised I was doing nothing more than hurting him and mercifully he took me back with open arms. Because he was Jimin. I vowed it would be the last time I ever hurt him. The next day Chim looked into the mirror with my arms around his and said to me.

“I look good today.”

Namjoon wrote the song Serendipity about the two of us and gave it to Jimin. When I first listened to it, alone in my room I cried. It was so beautiful. It was so perfect. He was so perfect.

Wings skyrocketed, we started to become big in America and toured there, learning a great deal more English until we all fairly fluent. We talked about moving there with the company, splitting Bighit between the two countries. They started to make preperations.

During our 8 dates in LA we decided to play a game. Each night we would dedicate a speech each to a chosen member. The final night was for the ARMY.

Night seven was my night.  Some of the things they told me got me bashful, a lump in my throat.

_“He’s the best big brother.”- JK_

_“He’s one of the strongest men I’ve met.”-NJ_

_“He cares. He really cares.”- J_

_“His smile makes me smile.” -JH_

_“He notices you when no one else does.”- V_

Then came Jimin. He rubbed his hands together. He looked so tiny and nervous as I sat on the stool in front of him. I longed to hold his hand.

“This is going to be a hard one.” He chuckled, and it rippled through the crowed. I smiled at him soft.

“I know I’m evil.” I joked. Jimin rolled his eyes and shook his head pushing his blonde hair back. The he started, an arm wrapped around my waist.

“For sometime now, people I think have thought Suga  was without emotion. He’s very still and very calm and people seem to think it’s because he has little love in his heart. And you know…you’re all wrong. Suga is nothing like that. He has the most open and beautiful heart.”

There was an awe that rippled through the crowd of light.

“There was a time…I sure you all know where I wasn’t very happy with myself…I did very sad things that made me sick.”

“WE LOVE YOU JIMIN!”

He smiled. “Thankyou…but I want this to be about Yoongi? Yeah? Anyway…he…he was the one to carry me to safety, he was the to defend me against angry executives and he was the one to ride with me to the hospital.  I-I don’t know if he knows that I know this or if he will let me say this aloud…”

My eyes adoring and filled with tears I nodded to him in consent.

“I-I saw Yoongi Hyung crying for me. He apologised, he blamed himself. He swore to look after me everyday. He…” Jimin cut off overwhelmed and covered his face as he started to cry. I pulled him close, made him sit on my lap and held him against me, head hooked over his shoulder. I felt his tension melt away and it was gorgeous.

“Yoongi stayed with me every night, carried all my problems with him, allowed me to be weak and cry and still managed to make me feel stronger than ever. It was three days and he never left me once unless to get me food or water. When we returned he made us each week express our feeling to whole group. It made us stronger, a real family. He wrote us all songs and spent longer producing our solos than even the Bangtan tracks. He wanted us to all feel loved by him individually. He is so selfless and generous with his time but…but what I love most about Yoongi is he doesn’t shout about it. He doesn’t make a fuss. He just faithfully works hard for us and loves us constantly.”

I buried my face in his shoulder to another chorus of awes.

“And I’m especially lucky. He has done so much for me, he has saved me in so many ways and I owe him so much. He may be a stone, but he is my stone and he is the stone I cling to on a stormy sea. He kept me alive and I-“

He cut off again and made another soft laugh as it started to get too much. I pulled him into my neck and he stayed there for a second. I looked over to the other members who were all crying. It hurt my heart. Namjoon raised his microphone but I signalled him to give my boy a moment.

Finally, he raised his head. “I-I’ve never felt more loved and wanted and worthy than I do with him. He makes me feel like I’m the most precious person little mochi. A man who has been through so much and I wish he would love himself as much as I love him. Because I do…” He looked at me for permission and I laughed through my tears and nodded.

He took a moment to beam at me. Make me fall even deeper for him. “My blue mould. I am so in love with Min Yoongi it hurts.”

There was a gasp and then an uproar of cheers of cheers from the audience.

For a second we just remained in a perfect gaze, eyes sparkling in stage light and then we gave in and met each other in a swooping kiss. The screams grew to a deafening height and if the deafened us I really couldn’t care because our family were wrapping their arms around us and our extended family were cheering from the stands.

When they say it gets better…I don’t think they thought it would ever get as good as this.


End file.
